AI-GENERATED DERPY SHOW

Set in the community-driven world of Jedi Knight: Dark Forces II players and modders.

SCROLL
DOWN

MEET THE CREW

Sith

Scoundrel Freelancer - Leader of the JK Crew

What he plans & what goes down usually ain’t one-and-the-same. He says the JK Crew’s motto is “Leave no man behind”, but somebody often ends up getting left behind.

Homeworld is Sith Mercenary Headquarters.

Gnarl

Demolitions - Cook - Member of the JK Crew

Demolitions expert, crew chef. Likes to say “Thanks Obama”, but nobody knows what he means. Often says “It’ll never smell the same again!” when he encounters something he likes (or dislikes.)

Homeworld is Club OC.

Nick

JK Historian - On-Assignment - Member of the JK Crew

Lore expert. Curator for the JK Archives, on-assignment as a member of the JK Crew to help find artifacts for him to catalogue. He always notices if the locations or details used are not “George Lucas’s original vision.”

Homeworld is unknown.

Beefy

Face Man - Actor - Member of the JK Crew

A space actor who uses his acting ability to solve the JK Crew’s challenges. Takes himself very seriously. Famous in some systems, completely unknown in others. His celebrity is respected by the Dralloc Corporation.

Homeworld is DraLLoC Hotel & Casino.

He doesn’t know what method acting is.

Strike

Slicer - Member of the JK Crew

A programmer who helps the JK Crew with his skills. His specialty is computers and hacking.

Homeworld is Shelva.

Pux

Slum Lord - Underworld Connection - Member of the JK Crew

The crew’s sketchy information broker. Has contacts everywhere – but he finds most want him dead on sight.

Homeworld is Death Valley Motel.

Spidey

Cleaner - Retained by the JK Crew

A skilled space assassin who stays sober but hangs with the stoner crew. He’s all about cleaning up the loose ends as he travels with the crew.

Homeworld is: don’t ask.

Cougar

Contact - Swindler

A two-faced businessman who secretly deals with the Empire while pretending to hate them. He coordinates a lot of missions, usually they are not exactly as he lets on.

His specialty is imperial connections.

Homeworld is unknown.

As they encounter all sorts of characters in their misadventures across the JK galaxy!

SEASON 3

  • S3E10
The Dead Man’s Tan

The crew receives a mysterious encrypted message summoning them to Nar Shaddaa, only to discover that Cougar, who they thought died in a fiery explosion last season, is alive, well, and sporting a fantastic tan.
  • S3E11
The Quantum Paperweight

Cougar sends the crew on a high-stakes heist to retrieve an ‘ancient gravity stabilizer’ from a secure vault, which turns out to be a very heavy object he needs to keep his tax returns from blowing away.
  • S3E12
The Load-Bearing Texture

Cougar hires the crew to steal a seemingly worthless piece of abstract art from the DraLLoC Hotel, not realizing the painting is actually a critical texture file holding the building’s geometry together.
  • S3E13
The Volleyball Physics Incident

The crew enters a beach volleyball tournament at Club OC, but the DerpyVision physics engine turns the sand into a glitchy nightmare and Beefy takes his Top Gun reenactment too far.
  • S3E14
The Escort Quest Nightmare

Cougar hires the crew to escort a ‘high-value asset’ across the dangerous wastelands of Purgatory, but the asset turns out to be Larry, whose pathfinding AI is so broken he can’t walk five feet without getting stuck on a rock.
  • S3E15
The T-Pose Pandemic

A digital virus sweeps through the galaxy, locking everyone into the default ‘T-Pose’ stance. The crew must navigate a stiff, frozen DraLLoC Hotel to find Patient Zero before their animations are deleted forever.
  • S3E16
The Safety Briefing

After insurance premiums skyrocket due to the new physics engine, Sith forces the crew to undergo a mandatory safety tour of SM HQ, which immediately becomes a hazard in itself.
  • S3E17
The Small Galaxy Heist

Cougar hires the crew to steal a specific singing animatronic from Disland’s ‘It’s a Small Galaxy’ ride, claiming it holds encrypted Imperial codes, but the doll turns out to be a decommissioned assassin droid with a catchy musical number.
  • S3E18
The Polygon Murder Mystery

The crew attends a high-society gala at the Shelva Pyramid Hotel, but when a wealthy guest suddenly clips through the floor and vanishes, they are accused of ‘murder by geometry’.

SEASON 2

  • S2E1
The Debt Collectors

When the crew finally does their accounting, they discover they’re massively in debt due to property damage, ‘cleaning’ fees, and Beefy’s extensive costume budget, leading to increasingly desperate money-making schemes.
  • S2E2
The Method Actor’s Madness

Desperate for credits to pay their debts, Beefy takes a job as a corporate sensitivity trainer, but his dedication to method acting each workplace scenario leads to chaos at an Imperial office.
  • S2E3
The Spice Must Flow

When Gnarly discovers a shipment of rare Kessel spices abandoned in their hangar bay, the crew attempts to sell it legitimately to pay off their debts, only to discover the hard way why it was abandoned.
  • S2E4
The Pux Protection Program: Reloaded

When Pux’s datapad viruses accidentally send Imperial secrets to the Rebellion, he’s wanted by both sides, and the crew must hide him again despite his complete inability to be stealthy.
  • S2E5
The Beefy Bounty

When Beefy is mistaken for a famous method actor wanted by the Empire for his uncanny impersonations, the crew must protect him from bounty hunters while he performs his greatest role yet: ‘Innocent Fugitive.’
  • S2E6
Galactic Chef Showdown

To pay off their debts, the crew enters Gnarly in the galaxy’s most prestigious cooking competition, but his experimental dishes and the team’s antics turn the event into a culinary catastrophe.
  • S2E7
Gnarly’s Goat

When Gnarly adopts a mysterious alien ‘goat’ as his new cooking mascot, the crew discovers it has an appetite for expensive technology and can duplicate anything it eats, leading to chaotic ‘copy-goat’ shenanigans.
  • S2E8
The Strike System

When Strike announces his own ‘strike system’ for handling misbehavior (as a counterpoint to Spidey’s), the crew is caught in an increasingly complicated web of competing punishment protocols.
  • S2E9
The Gord and Jester Chronicles

When the crew discovers Gord and Jester have been running underground No-Force-Sabers tournaments, they reluctantly become involved in the high-stakes galaxy of illegal dueling.

SEASON 1

  • S1E36
Ghost No More

When the crew discovers an ancient artifact that can bring force ghosts back to life, they reluctantly help Ghost Cougar return to corporeal form, only to face his inevitable third betrayal.
  • S1E37
The 28.8k Experience

When the crew gets bored at SM HQ, they decide to play retro games on Sith’s ancient Windows 95 computer, leading to chaos when Beefy method acts as various game characters and Nick has a breakdown over ‘canonical gameplay procedures.’
  • S1E38
The Midnight Munchies

When late-night cravings hit at SM HQ, the crew’s simple snack run to the local liquor store turns into an adventure involving Gnarly’s intense snack opinions, Beefy’s method acting as various convenience store roles, and Nick’s insistence on ‘canonical snack selection protocols.’
  • S1E39
Home Base Tour

When the crew realizes they haven’t fully explored their converted Imperial base headquarters, they conduct a full inspection of SM HQ, discovering bizarre Imperial leftovers and questionable modifications made by previous occupants.
  • S1E40
License to Grill

When the crew visits Shelva’s licensing office to renew their weapons permits, they discover Gnarly’s cooking credentials are also expired, leading to a chaotic dual-licensing adventure.
  • S1E41
The Upper Hand

When Gnarly reveals his master plan for revenge against Shelva’s diner (their competition), the crew reluctantly gets dragged into his petty bathroom-based vendetta.
  • S1E42
Third Time’s The Harm

Despite all previous evidence suggesting it’s a terrible idea, the crew attempts one final resurrection of Cougar, with Spidey along to ‘clean up’ any potential loose ends.
  • S1E43
The Cleaning Crew

When Spidey joins the crew full-time, they notice their contacts keep mysteriously disappearing after minor disagreements, leading to an awkward conversation about Spidey’s ‘conflict resolution methods.’
  • S1E44
The Competitive Edge

When Spidey challenges Sith to a game of Jedi Knight on his ancient computer, the crew discovers their assassin’s surprisingly intense competitive gaming side.